Consorting with the Enemy...

Okay...so I'll be "provoked" but only for a minute. It is hard for me to post here right now because it is sort of like "consorting with the enemy". (I know, I know.... the enemy is not the computer but me myself and I...the flesh) I sit down to check my email, to post on my blog, to post on Tessa's blog, to do any quick 5 to 10 minute thing and I am toast for the day... the night... time has no meaning. I loose control. I have tried just about everything you can think of to get a grip to little or no avail. Finally, in desperation I cried out to my Father. So, like everything else with me right now, He is dealing with me concerning it.

The computer became like a "drug-of-choice" for me only I guess I should call it of my "avoidance-tools-of-choice" that goes along with some recently uncovered "rebellion-tools-of-choice". I digress, those are topics for other posts....

Recently, I could really justify to myself using the computer (and I do mean using) because I was using it to "do" work that was God related "building this blog and finding out blog stuff for the gals in cell not that they asked me to and yada-yada-yada .... or to Mike for our families with Tessa's blog ...

I mean I wasn't using the computer to show Mike how it felt to be replaced anymore. To get even. I wasn't just wasting time playing games anymore. That was good and I was doing good stuff, Right?!

WRONG.

My Father said to me to stop and listen and wait. If I just check my email, Julies blog and a quick scan of the headlines I do okay. If I do much more than that then 3 hours disappear Poof! Even posting this little bit has been a battle of interruptions. It took 45 minutes to type down to the pink "If" in this paragraph before class this morning and 30 minutes just to get to here!

So if I'm not posting or little more than scripture and verse, please, understand, either I can't trust myself to be here more than that yet or I may not have been released to be here more than that yet.

;-) !